


Safety Measures

by tearbos85



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Gen, Humor, Reid gets hurt a lot, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-29
Updated: 2020-04-29
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:41:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23904025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tearbos85/pseuds/tearbos85
Summary: The BAU Team is tired of Reid getting injured every time they turn around. They decide to take extreme measures to prevent anymore incidents. This is an follow up piece to Editor Frog's fic 'Intervention', which is set post-Amplification. It might be helpful to read that first, but not necessary.https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5062104/1/Intervention
Comments: 6
Kudos: 131





	Safety Measures

Spencer Reid studied the brochure Morgan left him during visiting hours. The cover had the title 'Federal Agent Protection Program' in large, bold lettering. Near the bottom was neatly typed 'SSA Dr. Spencer Reid'. Morgan hadn't given him any explanation to go with the small booklet; he'd only stated that Reid should have been more careful after the "last time". He could only assume that referred to Morgan and Garcia's previous attempt to 'protect' him from the constant danger he always seemed to find himself in. That effort failed gloriously, resulting in his current hospital vacation. To be fair, he could have warned them that bubble wrap was extremely flammable- if they'd let him talk. It wasn't his fault that the most recent unsub had a penchant for flame throwers. Fortunately he hadn't required skin grafts, but he was confined to Walter Reed yet again for the next several weeks as the burns healed.

Having been here for two weeks already, he had nothing better to do than to study the 'program' that was apparently awaiting his release. The first page was titled 'Introduction'. The paragraph that followed went on to explain:

"The Federal Agent Protection Program (FAPP) was created by members of the FBI Behavioral Analysis Unit for the protection and future security of Dr. Spencer Reid. It has become apparent to us (FBI BAU) that SSA Reid is unable to avoid hazardous situations, sometimes through no fault of his own, and hereby needs to be placed into secure circumstances for the foreseeable future.

This brochure explains the basics of the FAPP and the measures that have been taken to put this into effect. Any additional issues or inquires should be directed to SSA Aaron Hotchner (or approved representative) for consideration on a case-by-case basis."

He grinned at how seriously his team members were taking this little joke. It amused him that they went to all the trouble to make this seem like something they would really do. Curious, he continued to read.

The title to the second page was 'Underground Security Bunker (USB)'. It went on to outline the features of what would be his new home:

"The USB is located in Mclean, Virginia at the home of SSA Aaron Hotchner. The USB is formed out of coated concrete and is flood, fire, earthquake, tornado, and pest retardant. Floors are tiled with slip resistant stone and walls are painted with non-flammable paint. The layout of the USB consists of a kitchen area, sleeping area, living area, and a separate bathroom. Additional facilities are available in SSA Hotchner's home but require his supervision and consent for usage.

Entry to the bunker is prohibited except by pass code and handprint verification. Only SSA Reid and SSA Hotchner will have access to the pass code, which will change every 15 days, and Technical Analyst Garcia will have the only emergency override code. Visitors are allowed per accompaniment by either SSA Reid or admittance by SSA Hotchner. Security cameras are installed every 20 feet and are connected to monitors inside the bunker, in a secure location inside SSA Hotchner's home, and in BAU headquarters with access limited to TA Garcia. Motion sensitive alarms are installed along the perimeter as well as at the entry point, and an emergency panic button is located at the monitoring station inside the bunker.

The bunker contains no flammable liquids, caustic chemicals, poisons, sharp objects, or breakable items. These items will not be allowed inside the bunker for any reason. Standard issue FBI weapon is permitted but must be kept in safe located in living area. Electrical outlets are low voltage and low-wattage light bulbs are made from shatter resistant glass. The kitchen area contains a microwave oven, flame retardant toaster, and a minimal heat hot plate. Non-toxic, organic cleaning supplies have been provided and do not require supervision for use. Electric razors will be permitted exclusively, and liquid soap is preferred for use in tiled areas. First Aid kits for emergency situation are located in both the kitchen and bathroom. Any additions to this bunker will be considered on a case-by-case basis.'

'Wow', he thought, 'they are certainly serious about this. I think maximum security prisoners aren't this well- guarded. He turned to the next section, which had the heading, 'Program Rules':

"An FBI security detail will accompany SSA Reid between SSA Hotchner's home and the FBI offices and on any personal time outside of the USB unless otherwise mentioned below. If SSA Reid should be out of the company of the security detail, and fewer than 2 armed FBI personnel are present, _full tactical gear must be worn_. Standard issue weapon must be kept on SSA Reid's person at all times other than inside the USB. Turning off of cell phone or disabling of tracking devices* is not permitted _at any time_.

No handling of knives, explosives, toxic or hazardous materials, or scalding instruments _without direct supervision_. SSA Reid is not permitted in or around abandoned buildings, roof tops, barns, sheds, wooded areas, cemeteries, bodies of water, public transportation, large crowds, kitchens, or online dating websites unless accompanied by trained FBI personnel. Operation of motor vehicles is prohibited excluding extreme circumstances and must then be supervised by trained law enforcement personnel.

No participation in raids, interrogations, arrests, interviews, press conferences, lectures, seminars, training exercises or classes is permitted without prior authorization by Unit Chief or appointed representative and fulfillment of previous rules. Travelling to police stations, crime scenes, or other locations required during an investigation must be supervised by at least 1 member of the BAU. These rules may be amended as necessary upon approval by SSA Hotchner."

The footnote at the bottom of the page read: '*Tracking devices will be installed on SSA Reid's person as well as cell phone, gun, messenger bag, and regularly used vehicles.'

"They must be joking," he thought out loud as he committed the 'rules' to memory. The next section said 'Potentially Hazardous Situations-AVOID':

-Forgotten or unknown family members, friends, or exes initiating unexpected contact

-Dark, unmarked vans with tinted windows (1)

-Machines that produce scalding liquids, contain sharp or moving parts, or exceed 10 MPH

-Persons displaying psychotic behavior on any level (2)

-Delivery persons, particularly unexpected

-Food, drink, or packages from unknown sources

-Private meetings, especially in secluded areas (i.e.-parks, alleys, bar restrooms, or parking garages)

-Undercover operations, particularly those not sanctioned by FBI

-Hostage situations of any sort

-Vacations

(1) Higher threat level if driven by at least one male with dark shades, or exceedingly pretty, overly friendly or confused-appearing woman

(2) Higher threat level if carrying or having access to weapons

"I don't believe this. They can't really expect me to follow this." He flipped over to the back page of the brochure. A shaded box surrounding big, bold letters read:

"The FAPP has been approved by BAU Unit Chief Hotchner, Section Chief Strauss, and FBI Director Warrens. They have pledged their support and resources for the success of this program, as have we, the undersigned."

The signatures of all of his team members, Gideon and Elle, his mother were all printed under the box. Under the signatures was the promise:

"SSA Reid will follow this program exactly. We are aware of the fact that he cannot forget the previously stated rules, and his acceptance or denial of this program does not preclude his participation in it. If this program in not followed precisely, we, the above signed, will kill him ourselves."


End file.
